Biggest Loser...sweat and tears..

Have you ever watch a reality TV show and cried?
yeah....well, it happens to me all the time..
Survivor, The Amazing Race...blablabla...
and also not forgetting The Biggest Loser...

The funniest thing was....I was in gym that time, and there was this episode (the transformation episode) whereby the contestants had a makeover, dress up and meet with their loved ones...
I had to suppress my tears because i was kinda embarrassed to show my tears to my friends..LOL
ANYWAY.....

I didn't cry this time because of the meeting-up-with-loved-ones-oh-so-touching scene...
i shed tears because i could relate myself to one of the contestant's siblings.

Pardon me, but i forgot his name..LOL..
but still, the contestant's brother was kinda huge too...and he didn't manage to get pass the audition part..i think...not too sure about that though..
when he met up with his transformed brother, he cried.....saying that ' Now i'm the only huge one (in the family) '

it kinda reflected back to how i was too last time...
everytime i went out with my friends, they could easily pick up clothes and shoes from the shelves.....where else i had to find those huge guy tshirts (sizing XXXL -no, i'm not joking)
It's very depressing everytime you see a piece of nice clothing, but it couldn't even go past your chest....
and it's even more depressing when you ask for the biggest size, and the promoter tells you that even the biggest size couldn't fit you...

Have any of you guys been through this? well....i have...a few times in fact...

Many people ask me why am i performing self-torture by starving myself, working out like a mad horse, keeping count of my calories..
well, you guys just couldn't understand what i've been through...
You guys have been thin all your life.....whilst i have been otherwise....

Don't tell me you understand how i feel.....you just dont....
Like the saying goes, if it doesn't prick you, it doesn't hurt....

yeah, sometimes i do eat normal food (rice, spaghetti and the likes..) but have you guys seen how much i've self tortured? NO....you guys do not know how hard i work in the gym, how difficult it is to contain the urge to grab a bite at night.....
So, for you people who often comment on what i eat......cut some slack ok? i'm also human..i need life....
don't come up to me and say ' EHHHH, YOU EAT SPAGHETTI A? IT'S DAMN FATTENING WAN YOU KNOW??!?!?!'  or ' DO YOU KNOW THAT EATING BREAD/BUN LIKE THAT IS WORST THAN EATING RICE!!??'

duh, it's like telling me 'your mom is a woman!!!'

I know what's the limit, i know what to do........so, unless you know how to construct your sentence, just shut up....
Don't rub it in anymore........you don't know what i've been through to reduce my size to this.....

Listening to : Zoku Natsume Yuujinchou - Ano hi Time Machine
Mood : =_=